Bears on Unicycles
by no2benry
Summary: This is a purely shmoopy, smutty, ultimately pointless oneshot vignette. That being said, hope you enjoy it! Oh, it's D/B...


**Obligatory disclaimer: I don't own jack about **_**Ugly Betty**_** and any of the characters and/or brand names mentioned. Silvio Horta does, and I make offerings to his shrine daily…**

**A/N: Hi, guys. Now, it may seem this oneshot vignette came out of nowhere and…well, it kind of did. I was in kind of a dark place (what with **_**UB**_** still being on hiatus then and all) and I came up with this. It takes place in the same universe as my **_**Positions**_** series, which I **_**will**_** get back to, I promise. Detty are married and Betty is pregnant. That's all the prerequisites. **

"Daniel, wake up." Betty was insistent.

"Mmmmf." Daniel, not so much.

"Daniel, I had a dream and I need to tell you about it before I forget it."

One ice-blue eye slowly peeled open. He was mightily cranky and Betty knew he would be and therefore any wringing of her pretty, silky-smooth neck would be entirely her own fault.

Betty had other ideas. If Daniel didn't like being awakened, it was tough toenails. It was his idea to go to couples' therapy in the first damn place, so insecure was he about magically turning into his father and hurting her or the baby somewhere down the line.

The therapist had suggested they tell each other about their dreams, which she vowed and declared always meant something. Betty would've taken her advice a lot more seriously if she hadn't been staring at her husband's crotch the whole time.

So Himself had this coming, oh, yes he did, precious.

Daniel struggled up on one elbow and glowered down at her. "All right, tell me about your randy, sweaty sex dream about me. Go on."

"Actually, I dreamed about a bear on a unicycle. It was juggling hairdryers and telling me not to poke the giants."

Daniel sighed and flopped back down onto the nest of pillows, pulling her down with him. "I told you not to eat those enchiladas before bed. Dipped in double-fudge mint cookie dough ice cream, no less."

Betty's cravings had gotten weirder and weirder, to the point that she was a walking pregnancy cliché and would start chewing on Daniel's ears or fingers in her sleep.

Betty snuggled in his arms, her head on his chest. No exotic, glamorous place on the planet could compare to this. She ran a finger down to his cute little inny navel. "So, what were you dreaming?"

She felt Daniel grin cheekily against her hair and could see, could _feel_ those dimples even with her eyes drifting closed. His hand drifted downward to splay against her womb.

"I'd tell you, but little pitchers have big ears."

Betty sat partially up. "Whisper it to me, then," she murmured, lightly trailing kisses and love-bites along the line of his jaw. Daniel obeyed, and Betty couldn't say she hadn't asked for it.

She'd always known that DotingDaddytoBe!Daniel would never totally eradicate the wild, devil-may-care, tragically flawed creature she'd first met. He'd never be completely tame, and she wouldn't have it any other way.

This was never clearer than when he was whispering extremely hot, dirty, yet wholly romantic things in her ear that made her blush and tingle even after living with this man, sleeping with him, for what seemed like forever.

As her cheeks turned pink and she started shaking, she hid her face in his shoulder. Daniel's deep purr of a chuckle reached her ears. "Oh, I'm not corrupting you, am I?" he asked in mock-concern, his face with its heartbreaking boyish innocence completely at odds with what his fingers were doing.

Before the last of her brain cells went on an extended hiatus to Jolly World, Betty's time at Mode, her time with this man, flashed through her mind in candy colors-- friendships, betrayals, falling-outs, heroic deeds, late nights, missed periods, moving boxes and, most of all, the kind of love that clung to their hearts like an ornery little marmoset.

They couldn't say they hadn't asked for it.

**Please proceed to hit the blue button and review my schmoopy, self-indulgent tale :D**


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